Victory in the Midst of Chaos

This past April, we awoke one morning to steady stream of water running in our kitchen.  It took hours to get it to stop, and by then the damage was done.  A water restoration team was called in to salvage what they could and dry out our house.  The water had affected five total rooms in our home, including two bedrooms.  In case you ever wondered, a restoration team coming to your house isn’t necessarily going to “restore” everything…….especially if your insurance company doesn’t feel like paying for it.  About one-third of our hardwood flooring in the kitchen had been ripped up, and our thirty year old, already rotting, particle board cabinets were in even worse shape then before.  Plus, we were out one dishwasher.  They wanted to slap a band-aid on it, so to speak.  Replace some wood flooring planks, refinish the floor, and call it good.  It was the ultimate lipstick on a pig scenario.  We really did consider it, but decided to hold off and think about it.  Weeks turned into months.  After numerous splinters in our toes from the bare subfloor, and serious frustration at the state of our kitchen, we decided to remodel…….from the ground up.  With all the extra medical costs this year, added costs for health needs, and some loss of income, this was NOT the best time to do this, so I decided I would take on as much of the labor as possible to save some money.  Had I ever taken on a project this big?  Well, um……NO, but I could do it, right???  Cue the evil laughter echoing from the shadows.  

The beginning of September, I jumped into the project with gusto.  It was exciting, and a bit overwhelming, picking out cabinets, fixtures, and flooring………measuring and remeasuring, and then remeasuring again.  Placing that cabinet order was exhilarating and highly stressful all at the same time.  With all my supplies ordered, it was time to jump into the demo.  Once you swing your four pound sledge into the side of a cabinet and take your reciprocating saw to the countertops, you know that there is no going back!  With all the stresses and pressures of the past year, let me just tell you…..that demo was one of the most cathartic things I have ever done!  There was pure satisfaction in taking out the old worn out kitchen and dreaming about the new one I was going to create.

In the midst of all this demo mess, we’ve also been living with mess everywhere else!  When you no longer have a kitchen to store all of your kitchen-y things, that means it all has to go somewhere else.  My dining room, living room, and garage are all a disaster zone.  For the record, I have a perfectionist nature and LOVE a clean and orderly home.  Renovating is the ultimate chaos, and I confess to having a few meltdown moments…….okay, more like meltdown days.  Somedays it’s so hard to look around me and not just scream.  Despite the frustrations, there have been some seriously awesome moments of pure victory.  A few weeks ago, one of my most amazing friends came over to help me lay tile…….something I have never done before!  Watching her not only blessed my socks off, but it gave me confidence to continue in this journey.  In fact, I’m even working on tile now for my laundry room.

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This past weekend, I put up the first wall cabinet……all by myself.  That was some pretty intense satisfaction.  I’m finally starting to see my vision coming to life.  Yesterday, the range hood finally went up.  That 112 pound bad boy was especially challenging, and I literally cried when I slid the crown moulding into place.  This project has definitely stretched me, but it’s also given me even more confidence in my designing abilities.  It’s given me the opportunity to grow, but also to teach.  Yesterday I was telling my daughter that anything that you really want in life that is worth while, you HAVE to be willing to fight and reach for it.  All of us have areas of chaos in our lives, but those areas can offer us the greatest victories if we are willing to look for them.  My kitchen is still far from done.  I’m sure I still have many moments of frustration ahead, but I know that victories are also waiting for me along the way.  God is using my process of creating to create more beautiful things in me!  I encourage you to embrace your areas of chaos and see what blessings and victories are hidden there for you discover.  Growth is so much sweeter and more rewarding than stagnation.  I say……search for the victory!